Dear Rabbi Simon,
In my Shemoneh Esrei, I add names in for ill people in the Refa’einu prayer. I am unsure as to what really qualifies for inclusion and when you should remove their name from your prayers. So typical examples are – a person who has an ongoing illness that is not life threatening but they could do with a refuah eg Alzheimer’s/ arthritis, etc What about a family member sick in bed with a common cold- and then similar to my above question, a person who is stable but still recovering from serious surgery?
WRT one’s private prayers, even a family member, friend, or for that matter one’s self, who has the flu, cold, or a headache, may reasonably be mentioned in one’s personal prayer for healing. This demonstrates one’s concern for that person, and equally, an awareness that healing comes from Hashem. Similarly, it prompts one to concentrate better on his prayers—or at least that one blessing of the Amidah. So I would say that in all of those examples it would be appropriate to mention the patient’s name. But if time is short, etc, you should not feel delinquent for failing to do so.
I hope this is helpful.
Rabbi Rashi Simon