Dear Rabbi Simon
I have just heard (a bit belatedly) of the sad news of the recent deaths of two relatives, an uncle and an aunt (separately, but within a few days of one another). I have been asked by my father to say Kaddish for them in shul, which I did this evening (to honour his request). Was this the right thing to do? Should I say Kaddish for them daily even though I am not actually in mourning? For how long should I say Kaddish for them? (Of course for my mother I said Kaddish for 11 months, but is this different?)
Kalman
Hi Kalman
First, I wish you and all your family “long life”. Although it is not obligatory, it is indeed a mitzvah and an act of chesed to say Kaddish for your relatives, particularly at your father’s request. (I am presuming that the deceased did not leave progeny who will recite kaddish on their behalf.) In accordance with the particular circumstances and the widespread minhag, there is no impediment to your saying Kaddish for them for as long as you would like. In your circumstances I would suggest once per tefillah for 30 days. מן השמים תנוחמו.
Rabbi Rashi Simon