Dear Rabbi Simon,
We have a candidate for conversion (through the LBD) lodging with us. We would like to invite a friend of hers (similar, not-yet-Jewish status) for a yom tov meal. I am aware that this gives rise to halakhic complications, and I have even been advised that we may not extend such an invitation altogether.
This seems harsh to me, since who else is meant to invite them? How will a prospective convert experience yom tov in a Jewish home if no one is allowed to invite him or her?
Please can I ask – what is the halachic situation regarding inviting a conversion candidate (who is not staying in our home as part of the process) for a Yom Tov meal?
Many thanks,
Elisha
Dear Elisha,
Thank you for your practical question.
Indeed, the Shulkhan ‘Arukh (OH 512:1 based on the Talmud Betzah 21) seems to forbid inviting a nokhri for a meal on yom tov, lest one prepare hot food specifically for him. Here is the background: Cooking on yom tov is allowed for the purpose of enhancing the experience of the chag for those who are obligated in the mitzvah of yom tov. As a gentile has no such obligation, the permission to cook for him or her does not apply. This can potentially be a Torah violation. For this reason, the Sages forbade extending an invitation to a gentile, as it is the manner of a host to seek to meet the needs of his guest. This may lead the host to inadvertently come to cook specifically on behalf of his non-Jewish guest. As a precaution, the Sages ordained: Do not invite him in the first place. (BTW, you can offer him food if he turns up unexpectedly. But that does not really help, as how will s/he know to turn up at the door, and when?)
A ben- or bat-bayit is not included in the prohibition of extending an invitation, as s/he is a member of the household. (The prohibition of expressly cooking additional food for him or her would still apply, however.)
As you say, in the case of a conversion candidate (who is not living with a family) we have to wonder, how will he experience yom tov, if no one will invite him. (This is particularly relevant for Pesach and Sukkot, of course, but is pertinent to Shavuot and Rosh HaShanah as well.)
Several “workarounds” have been proposed, all of which are somewhat awkward, limiting, or halakhically questionable.
Bottom line, in recent years the LBD has relied on an approach cited in the name of the eminent Rav SZ Auerbach, to the effect that one who is in the process of conversion under the auspices of a Beth Din may be invited for a Yom Tov meal for the purpose of (inter alia) modelling an example of mitzvah-observant ways. The logic is that since the host invites the conversion candidate for the purpose of demonstrating halakhically authentic behaviour, he will not come to thoughtlessly violate the canons of halakhah at that very time.
I hope this is helpful.
Best wishes
Rabbi Rashi Simon