Dear Rabbi Simon,
Can my wife call my parents by their first names? That’s how their other daughters-in-law refer to them, but none of these are halakhically meticulous. Please advise if this is permitted.
Thanks
Moshe
Hi Moshe
Thank you for your practical and sensitive question. There is indeed an obligation to honour one’s in-laws, as a (rabbinic) derivative of the mitzvah of honouring one’s own parents. Nevertheless, although one is not allowed to address his or her parents by their first names, one may do so in the case of parents in law, particularly if this is the convention in the family. (This distinction may arise from the difference between the mitzvah of kavod [respect] and the further obligation–in the case of one’s own parents–of yirah [reverence] as well.) Mum or Dad may be more affectionate, however ????.
Mazal tov again on your marriage.
Best wishes
Rabbi Rashi Simon