Dear Rabbi Simon
Here is an awkward one:
I have a friend who converted to Judaism through non-Orthodox channels (not in the UK). He subsequently moved to Israel, where he lives in a community in the area known as Yehuda and Shomron, ie the Administered Territories (or what the UN calls the West Bank). He loves the Land of Israel and leads a Jewishly authentic life there. However, he never took any steps to “upgrade” his original conversion. This means that, halakhically, he is not Jewish—though the people around him are likely unaware of this.
He recently spent a Shabbos with me. I mentioned to him that it would be a good idea for him to regularise his Jewish Status, but he did not express much interest in doing so. I let it go. Not for me to moralise.
In the afternoon, we went together to Mincha and, sure enough, he and I were the 9th and 10th men in the minyan. I could not bring myself to embarrass him publicly by alerting the rabbi, however discreetly, to my friend’s status, as the circumstances would immediately be apparent to anyone who can count to ten. So I said nothing, and the services commenced with none the wiser. But I felt like an accomplice to a crime.
What should I have done?
Gerry
Hi Gerry
Very awkward indeed. Rather than dwell on the intractable problem of exposing your friend’s identity in the circumstance you describe (having been placed, through no fault of your own, in an invidious position), I would use it as an opportunity to tactfully encourage him (once more) to regularise his Jewish Status as a matter of utmost priority. I wonder how many other times he has (misre)presented himself as halakhically Jewish and misled others as a result? Moreover, he leaves himself—to put it bluntly—living a lie. Even psychologically this cannot be a good thing.
Nevertheless, you cannot live his life for him, or serve as his self-appointed halakhic advisor. Ultimately it is his life, his conscience, his integrity. Just hope that next time there will be another 9 men when the two of you arrive for Mincha.
Sincerely
rabbi rashi simon